Archive for help for moms

The Worlds Toughest Job…what is it?

I hate to admit it but what I thought was the toughest job is not what this is about and it struck me in a way that I thought it was worth sharing.  

Before I watched it my mind jumped to a few conclusions as to what it would be about…

Top on my list were:

  • Alaskan fishing jobs (I saw a movie on this once documenting how dangerous it is and it has just stuck with me…not sure why I put this on top of the list but it was the first thing that came to mind)
  • Police officer in an inner city ghetto (dealing with drug dealers and gangsters seems really tough..that’s an understatement I’m sure)
  • US Soldier (goes without saying, no explanation needed here!)
  • Neurosurgeon (like Dr. Ben Carson…who separates conjoined twins)
  • ….something along these lines..

But it wasn’t any of these.  This is a real job interview for a real job put on by a real boss.  Comment below when you are done and let me know what you thought it was!

 

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Unjunk Your Mind and Your Plate

Family Food Experts Radio Show

Food can be such a touchy topic for parents and kids.  How do you get your children to eat healthy meals when all they want is pasta with butter, chicken nuggets and pizza? Well that can be a difficult challenge, but not impossible to solve.  

Join me with Ellen Briggs, founder of Kid Kritics and Stacey Antine, founder of HealthBarnUSA as we talk about the mindsets that prevent us from taking good care of ourselves and our children. This interview is full of ideas, recipes and fun.  Listen in as we solve some of the challenges parents face everyday.

Click Here to listen in NOW! 

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Fall Semester Classes- OPEN

The air is finally cooling off a little bit here in Florida.  How about you?  Are you enjoying the change of seasons?  But despite the break from the hot summer sun, the holiday season can be a tough one for moms.  Not only are we busier than ever, but the pressure to make everyone else happy is heightened and it can leave us lacking for time, energy and patience.Although we all desire a ‘picture perfect’ family (and are eager to send cards showing everyone our happiness), behind closed doors we might be a little more stressed than we allow others (except our children) to see.So if you are feeling overwhelmed, if you are dreading the next few months or if you just want to find a better way to not only cope, but breeze through this time of year with a smile on your face, then you are reading the right email!

Give yourself the gift of education.  Our two University of Moms signature courses, led by me, are about to launch LIVE in just a few weeks.  They are aptly named Self-Care for Moms 101 and STOP Reacting 101 and in them I share the nitty gritty details of how I went from a stressed-out and unhappy mom (who yelled a lot) to a mom who is now calm, happy and patient.

Here is what one mom had to say who took both courses.  And check it out, she is a parent educator and and early intervention specialist!  Who would have thought she needed this course?  But she did!I originally decided to take the sample class because I thought It would be interesting and I could possibly use it to count for my job as a parent educator/ early intervention specialist for some continuing Ed classes. While taking the class I realized it was a blessing that it fell into my lap. I have 3 small children and the perfect life I had always dreamed of. Why then was our family full of so much yelling and reacting. Why did I feel out out control and not supported. Through April’s classes and incredibly supportive coaching I was able to dig deeper and realize I wasn’t taking care Of myself.  The stop reacting class was so wonderful for myself and my whole family. This class went above and beyond my expectations. April is a gifted life coach and the class and her coaching have truly been life changing for everyone in my family. ~Dana M., Family Counselor, NC
Each course is 4 weeks long and costs only $39.
Or take both classes for just $69 and get my book Ride the Wave: Journey to Peaceful Living free!
Click the images below to read the course descriptions.
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So skip the new shoes or the monthly pedicure and invest in yourself.  Learn something new and then do something different and I guarantee you WILL get different results.  Like more peace in your house, less stress and rushing and a richer, deeper appreciation for yourself as a mother and a woman.If you can’t join us at the LIVE times as posted don’t worry.   The classes will be recorded and provided to you each week by email so you can listen in when it works best for you.  All live class options include a private Facebook group for support (optional) where you can ask questions and meet new mommy friends too.For the small amount of time and money required to participate, you will reap great rewards that will make your life happier.  You’re children will learn, from you, how to be proactive in life, not a victim, they’ll learn how to find constructive solutions to life’s challenges and how to manage their emotions with ease.

All of this is possible…and more!  How do I know?  Because my house is DIFFERENT than it was just 5 years ago.  It’s quiet.  It’s not stressful.  We look for answers together instead of pointing fingers at one another…and best of all I know how important it is to take charge of my own happiness. I’m not waiting around anymore for someone else to give it to me.  That is why I can honestly say…JOIN ME.  Let me show you how you can have all this too.

As always much love today and always.  Here’s to your peace.  Your happiness.  Your family.  Let it be a pillar for others to admire…all because you created it to be.

April O’Leary
Certified Life Coach
Founder of UofMoms.com
Proud Mother of 3Author of Ride the Wave: Journey to Peaceful Living
Co-Author of Focus on You: Your Needs Matter Too!
www.apriloleary.com and www.uofmoms.com
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Self-Care tips for Moms

I shared some info with my friends over at Just Between Friends that I thought you’d like to see.  It comes from experience and a lot of trial and error.  More error than success frankly.  So although I am not always a perfect example, I am learning each day how to make sure I take care of me, so that I can take care of others to a greater degree.

Click here and you’ll see my TOP 3 TIPS for moms on how to take better care of yourself, and find more happiness in the busy-ness of life.

If you enjoy it please sign up to get our FREE 4-lesson Video Course called “Find Time For You And Be Happier Too!” these tips and more are shared along with exercises to help you uncover areas where you are getting stuck and how you can overcome some of these common self-care sabotage mindsets.

Get Your Free Video e-Course Here

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Lots of love!!

 April O’Leary, Life Coach
Founder of the University of Moms
Creator of the Happy Mom Conference

Author of Ride the Wave and Focus on You
Proud mother of 3 girls

 

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Free Happy Mom Resources

Finishing School

I am happy to share the new University of Moms Finishing School: Free Download page with you!  In it you’ll find lots of audio lessons, workbooks I’ve created over time, interviews and articles to help you on your journey towards greater peace and happiness as a mom.  There is no better place to be than when you are content with where you are at in life, you are in control of your emotions and you have enough time for you.  Trust me!

All of this material was learned the hard way, in the trenches being an at-home mother of 3 kids under the age of 5…by doing what didn’t work first.  As I got some outside help in the form of 8 weeks of therapy back in 2008 I learned that it is not selfish to take care of yourself.  Why hadn’t anyone taught me that before?!

So use these lessons as a lighthouse shining you towards the bay of peace.  You may be experiencing some rough waters now, but if you put what you learn into practice the waters will slowly calm down, your ride will become easier and the sun will start shining.  Enjoy the ride!

To get the whole library of goodies Click Here.  No email required, just my gift to you!

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Stop Reacting, Mom!

If you were on our free call yesterday for Fun Friday you’ll remember me mentioning about RFA’s, which are Red Flag Alerts.  Here is my own personal story with RFA’s that I thought you might enjoy reading.

I am not endorsing Christianity or any other religion, but this was my experience, which is a common message taught to women whether through religion, culture or media.  Luckily that’s changing somewhat today, but I think you’ll get the point from my specific story and be able to apply it to your unique situation.   Especially if you find you’re frequently putting your needs behind everyone else’s.

When I was a child I was taught a song in Sunday School that went something like this:

Jesus and others and you
What a wonderful way to spell joy
Jesus and others and you
in the life of each girl and each boy
“J” is for Jesus for He has first place,
“O” is for others you meet face to face,
“Y” is for you, in whatever you do,
Put your self third and spell JOY.

I remember patiently raising my hand silently hoping to get picked to hold one of the J-O-Y cardboard squares at the front of the class.  I learned to put myself last at a very early age, and that is what I believed for years.  Indeed I even found a blog that still promotes this way of thinking, (which is how I found the lyrics to that song of old as well).

But fast forward a few years.  Being a young mother with three children and this mentality became a problem for me.  Why?  Because the endless list of the needs of others never ends.  Whether it’s tying shoes, making sippy cups, changing diapers, cleaning up messes, making dinner or doing laundry, these “O”thers take over.  And the result for me became anger, frustration and resentment.

Now what is a woman to do who is supposed to be experiencing JOY by serving others, and isn’t?  For one thing I felt guilty.  Not only were the negative emotions confusing to me they were not okay in my opinion.  So I tried harder.  I felt like a terrible person for not feeling joy in serving others.  And the cycle of anger, frustration, guilt and resentment continued.

This describes many women, and certainly describes what I experienced as an at-home mother those years ago.  I was giving and doing until there was nothing left.  I was breathing out in service to others in  but was not breathing in to serve myself.  If you’ve ever traveled by airplane you know the gig, “Put your mask on first…then help others.”  Well it makes sense in the physical world, but why doesn’t it make sense in the emotional, non-physical world?  Hello, it does!

So this is where the shift comes in.  I call these emotional bumps in the road RFA which simply means a Red Flags Alert.  The story of Mary and Martha illustrates it beautifully.  Here is the quick story for those of you who aren’t familiar with it from the New Testament book of Luke, Chapter 10.

38 As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. 39 She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. 40 But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”  41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

I hated this story because I was Martha.  I couldn’t understand why Mary was getting the validation and here was Martha working her tail off to help serve the crowd.  Martha was serving others, and Mary was not.  Martha was busy, helping, serving to make sure everyone else’s needs were met.  Mary was sitting down taking it all in.

What had Mary chosen that Martha had not?  Mary chose to take care of herself first.  She wasn’t worried about everyone else.  She wasn’t putting everyone else before her.  If that would have been the ‘right’ way to do things certainly Jesus would have said, “Yes, Mary, get up and help your sister Martha,” but He didn’t.

And how do we know Martha had not chosen properly, her emotions were telling her so…she was getting an RFA (remember a “Red Flags Alert”)!   It says she was distracted by all the preparations and shouted out (at Jesus!) “Don’t you care…!”  It says she was worried and upset about many things.  I can picture her rushing around, complaining playing the ‘it’s not fair’ card.  Maybe she was thinking, “Sure, as usual, I invite the crowd in and no one helps me.  No one ever helps me.  I guess I’ll just have to do this all myself.  Mary is so self-centered…look at her just sitting there…while I rush around and make sure everyone else  is ok….Typical!”

How often do we do this to others?  We want people to notice all we’re doing and when they don’t we get upset.  We want others to change, to help us more, but the only one we can change is ourselves.  This is what Martha didn’t understand.  And how you know you have crossed that fine line over from serving into sacrifice is…notice your emotions and see if you are getting an RFA!

So the moral to the story is:

1)  Serving others is noble to the degree you can do it with a happy heart.

2)  Once your emotions become negative or you start to resent others, think life is unfair or feel distracted by all that life has for you to ‘do’ take notice.  This is your RFA!

3)  Make corrections to your RFA by stepping back and taking care of you first.  Service with a sour attitude benefits no one.

So go ahead.  Be Mary and take care of yourself first.  All that others stuff can wait.  That is choosing the better part and it won’t be taken from you.  If this is you won’t you consider taking action and doing something for you today!  If you haven’t already join uofmoms.com FREE and start putting yourself back on the priority list.  🙂

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Sex for Moms 101: Rekindle the Flames of Passion with Dr. Jen Landa

Listen in to her wisdom on Monday, August 27th at 12pm EST/ 9am PST LIVE
via webcast, phone or Skype.  To join in CLICK HERE.

Are you feeling a little less that passionate?  Are you tired, overwhelmed and finding you privacy invaded at every turn?    Is sex is just one more thing to check off the list?  Do you long for those early care-free days pre-children where spontaneity ruled your desires?  For many moms, it’s not that we don’t want to be romantic anymore…but who has the time?!

The Sex Drive Solution for Women: Dr. Jen's Power Plan to Fire Up Your LibidoWell Dr. Jen Landa, Board Certified Ob/Gyn, mother of 2 and author of The Sex Drive Solution for Women, understands these problems and has gone through them herself.  She says that making time to rekindle your passion and rewire you desire is extremely important in any relationship and can be a very satisfying part of your routine.  Routine?  Yes, she says you have to create habits that make room to add-in time for pleasure and she’ll give you tips on how you can get your mojo back.   Your honey be glad you did!

Dr. Jen's 30-Day ProgramTo get her free video series to learn 11 ways you can spark the flames of love again Click Here.

To sign-up for her 30-Day Program Click Here.  It costs less than 1 night at a hotel and it will do more for your bedroom life than one night away will too!

Join us every Monday right here at the University of Moms to learn from experts!  We are here to support you every week in your journey as a mom.  If you’re not a member yet, join us now…it’s FREE and you’ll get access to the full University Download Library where you can listen to seminars and download worksheets, workbooks and more to help you be the best mom you can be!

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3 Keys to Cutting Credit Card Debt for Families

Joe Paretta is a coach, author, speaker, and teacher. He earned both a Bachelor’s and a Master’s degree from Hofstra University in New York. Master The Card: Say Goodbye to Credit Card Debt…Forever! is his first book.  But most importantly he is a dad, a family man, and has some wisdom to share with us about how to get out of credit card debt for good.

After overcoming a struggle with personal credit card debt in his life, he decided to share his journey publicly, for which I commend him greatly, and he wrote this book.

I had the privilege of reading Master the Card and I can tell you that if you struggle with overspending, maxing out your cards, paying the monthly minimum or just convenience charging stuff you really don’t need, this is the book for you.  Joe’s advice on how to get out of the addictive habit of credit card spending is practical and relevant.

Join Joe and me on Monday, August 20th at 12pm EST/ 9am PST where he is going to give us 3 Keys to Cutting Credit Card Spending that you can use with your family.  You don’t want to miss this!  CLICK HERE to join in LIVE.  If you haven’t joined yet as a FREE member to the University of Moms you can do so NOW and get access to the recording of this interview along with a whole library of materials you can download to help you on your journey as a mom.

Helping you be the best you can be!  We’re here for you!  All the best, April

Visit Joe Online:
Facebook: www.facebook.com/people/Joseph-Paretta
Web site: www.joeparetta.com

 

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5 Tips to Build Your Marriage While Nurturing Your Children

What makes a marriage successful?  Why is it so difficult to keep your marriage strong when you have children?  Well, for starters, when was the last time you had a chance to sit down and actually talk to your partner….uninterrupted?!  Most of us know we want a happy marriage, but balancing an adult relationship with the demands children bring can be quite difficult in the ‘real world’.

This Monday, August 6th at 12pm EST/ 9am PST I’m happy to introduce Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz, America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts to you LIVE as we kick off Motivate Your Monday, Mom! and they share 5 Tips to Strengthen Your Marriage While Nurturing Your Children.  CLICK HERE to view the event.

As a bit of background: Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz are renowned love and marriage experts and multiple award-winning authors. As “The Official Guides To Marriage” for www.SelfGrowth.com, the top self-help website in the world, and Marriage Experts for www.PsychologyToday.com and Marriage Advice Examiners for www.Examiner.com, they provide inspiration and guidance to readers around the globe. Affectionately dubbed “America’s Love Birds” by their clients, fans, and workshop participants, Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz know that simple things matter in relationships. They understand what makes relationships work because they have conducted three decades of research on successful marriages on six continents of the world, as well as sharing personal experience drawn from their own 45-year marriage.

Together, the Schmitz’s have written multiple award-winning and best-selling books, as well as being popular speakers and talk show guests. Their latest book, Building a Love That Lasts, provides surprising insights on creating successful relationships (Published by Jossey-Bass/Wiley).   We will be discussing their book as well.  Click the book or the link above to view it on Amazon.  For even more info visit their website at www.simplethingsmatter.com.

So go ahead and join us, MONDAY, AUGUST 6th at 12pm EST/ 9am PST LIVE by webcast, phone or Skype.  CLICK HERE to view the event and remember to mark your calendar to return on Monday.  Come with your questions too which you can submit online or raise your virtual hand to ask them.  If you can’t come live, register as a member at uofmoms.com FREE and you’ll get the recording via email after the event occurs.  The recording is for members-only.

Welcome Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz!

 

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